I'm only 13 or 14 weeks along and I'm already feeling the wisdom of Gwen Stefani's answer to a reporter about life after her second child. Every day confirms my suspicions about second pregnancies being a whole other can of worms. I'm squinting hard trying to make out any silver linings -- even a gray lining will do on this cloud. During my first pregnancy I didn't want it to end because I felt so great the whole time. This one I don't want to end because I know that despite all the exhaustion I'm going through it will be nothing compared to life after the arrival of the new baby.
On the plus side -- hello silver linings -- I lost 6 kgs in the first 10 weeks thanks to all the nausea and nonstop running to and fro around my preschooler. Since I ballooned after having Mona almost four years ago, any weight loss is more than welcome. Frankly, any mom-to-be needs all the figure-related ego boost she can get the second time around, especially since the first time it's all about showing off the slim waist and baby bump in clothes as colorful as you dare and this time... you want to run and hide under a tent. Sigh.
The biggest difference between the first time and the second time -- at least for me -- is that this time it's not stamped on your forehead like it seemed it was the first time. People absolutely couldn't care less. Except for my mom, of course, God bless her. With pretty much the rest of the world you have to explain to everyone around the table -- several times during the same meal -- why you keep scrunching up your nose in disgust at every food item in sight, and when you're done explaining you have to fight off the incessant albeit well-intentioned pleas to try this and try that several other times, and then you have to soothe every offerer's rumpled feathers (the hostess is a whole other story) until your nausea kicks back with a vengeance.
Thank God for humorous pregnancy authors. I laughed my head off reading Sinead Moriarty's snarky article on second pregnancies and I ordered a book that seems it was written just for me through my favorite online bookstore, Bookspot. The title itself is a killer: Pregnancy Sucks: What to Do When Your Miracle Makes You Miserable, and the book is really funny and snarky and very supportive, especially when people denounce you as ungrateful to the blessing of having another child. It was a real lifesaver several times for me. If it weren't for the author's brilliant snarky commiseration, I would've exploded that I am grateful, thank you very much, but my legs are unbelievably swollen and pooping has become a hazy memory and the term morning sickness is a lie because the nausea is there 24-7, not to mention the crazy mood swings thanks to the horror-mones, and just venting about the discomfort doesn't mean make me an ungrateful monster, damn it! Which of course would have rendered all goodwill between me and several people damaged beyond repair. I'm actually considering emailing the author with my personal thanks for saving some of my important relationships.
Nonetheless, I am grateful -- so far, apart from the usual pregnancy discomforts, it's been blessedly uneventful. Hopefully it remains that way until I can convince DH to agree on the names I want. He is adamantly against them, but I'm due in January so there's plenty of time for me to try to convince him why Elias and Aida are the most beautiful names on earth.
1 comments:
Yay for Elias and Aida! Back in Lebanon, my hometown, these are very popular names. I love them.
By the way, I really would LOVE to get to know you. I have a little 3 year old and a 6 month old. My second pregnancy was WAY better than my first. I think it's because during my first I had no money AT ALL. We were practically homeless! By the second pregnancy we were doing well. And by the way, with Mona being 4 years old already, I really think with the second baby it'll be fine. My second baby (girl, Baylasan) is not at all fussy and she's always just so consumed with my first kid (boy, Adam) and he loves her too and yea sure, it's hard, I haven't gone out in AGES, but really it's because I don't have friends who would want to hang around someone with a 3 year old and a six month old. Ah, life is strange. Anyhow, it's really not that bad :)
Also, I found you through the facebook group "playmates in egypt". Adam is the same. He looks at other kids as though they were the eighth wonder of the world as you so perfectly put it xD Only I don't take him to a nursery, the good ones are far and a bit costly :( But really mostly far because we live like in the butt of Cairo!
Let's be friendssss! I love pregnant and hormonal. I'm always hormonal. Blame the BC pills.
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